Airhead Behavior Becomes New Human Norm As Underachievement Reaches New Heights

by Tom Attea

Today, look high and low, and what do you see? Airhead behavior - in fact, so much of it that it's threatening to become the new human norm. What is going on here? And can we find hope anywhere?

Yes. Where, you may ask? We'll take a look.

But to infuse the proceedings with appropriate levity, let's first present NewsLaugh's Ten Slams For New Heights In Underachievement.

Then we'll turn to those gifted and resilient human beings who refuse to partake in the worldwide slide toward the moronic and, instead, valorously persist in their commendable quest for overachievement.

Here are Ten Slams For New Heights In Underachievement

1. The insurgents in Iraq, for explosively undermining the peaceful and progressive rebuilding of their own country, along with terrorists everywhere, for cloaking murder with religious-speak apparently without realizing that their verbal yip "God is great" and operational guideline "Life is cheap" are at idiotic odds with each other, since, if God is great, He'd only make great things, just alike a great dumbbell maker would only make great dumbbells.

2. The Taliban in Afghanistan, for managing to preserve themselves from any notion of truly religious behavior, which must, for all God's chillin, include effusive mutual consideration, not to mention the same for one's perhaps turban-tossing self, as well as Islamic militants of similar ilk wherever they so mercilessly inflict their airborne medievalism.

3. The Palestinians who keep firing rockets at Israel, which are actually metaphorical rockets they're firing at their woeful selves.

4. The Iranian "mullahtocracy" for alarming the world and any sane member of their own society by the senseless and impossible pursuit of nuclear hegemony in the region and threats to civilized folks with far more weaponry.

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